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Here’s a laugh – some prat in Lys, right, got caught mid-massage with a goat! True story, swear it – locals called it “the bleatin’ rubdown.” Made me cackle, then gag. Sexual-massage ain’t all rose petals and silk sheets, nah, it’s messy, raw, human. Gets me thinkin’ – power’s in the hands, yeah? Who’s givin’, who’s takin’? Like in *Caché*, “You’ve seen worse,” I’d smirk, watchin’ some lord squirm under a servant’s grip.

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Then, I get a call from my buddy, Sean. He’s down at the Diamond, and he’s like, “You gotta come see this!” I’m thinkin’, “What now?” But I’m curious, so I head over. The Diamond is always buzzing, ya know? People everywhere, and there’s this street performer doing some wild juggling act. I’m talkin’ flaming torches and all that jazz. I’m like, “This guy’s gonna set himself on fire!” But he doesn’t. Just my luck, right?

Monaghan boss Bannigan looking forward to league final