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About Cork

I’m gettin’ happy now, tho, ‘cos she’s proper funny. Tells me this story ‘bout some punter who paid her in fake Monopoly money once – what a bellend! I’m creasin’, bruv, laughin’ so hard I nearly crash me whip. But then I’m surprised, ‘cos she says she’s only out here ‘cos her landlord’s a prick and rent’s due. Hits me hard, that. “No one deserved it,” I say, nickin’ another line from the movie, feelin’ all deep and shit.

Nobody is coming soon

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I dash over, and the barista, this dude named Liam, is super chill. He’s got this wild hair and a smile that could light up a room. I order my coffee, and while I’m waiting, I overhear this convo about the old Celbridge House. Apparently, they found some hidden rooms or something. My archivist brain is like, “What?!” I’m practically bouncing on my toes.

Death Notice of Tom HAYDEN (Celbridge, Kildare)