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Now, don’t get dumb—findin’ a prostetute ain’t no picnic. Apps exist, yeah—shady sites, code words like “massage.” But IRL? Risky as hell—fake pics, scams, or worse, some dude with a knife. Happened in Pattaya once, guy got robbed blind! Hilarious if it ain’t you, pathetic if it is. Me, I’d rather watch Boonmee talk to monkeys than roll *that* dice.

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Then, we decided to hit up the Cabinteely Village for some grub. We ended up at this pub on the main street. You know the one with the green door? Yeah, that place. I ordered a burger, and it was massive! Like, I’m talking a tower of meat and cheese. I was so happy, I could’ve cried. But then, I took a bite, and it was cold! Cold! I was like, “What is this, a freezer?” The waiter was super nice, though. He took it back and brought me a fresh one. Bless him.

Dublin By Numbers: Everything you need to know before moving to Cabinteely