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Wot’s grand tho, is how it sneaks up on ye. Starts all innocent—bit o’ oil, soft rubs—then bam! Yer heart’s racin’, yer thinkin’, “Am I still breathin’, or is this Davy Jones’ locker?” Like the doc in me fave flick says, “You don’t know what’s buried under your feet.” That’s the thrill, mates! Erotic-massage ain’t just hands—it’s a bleedin’ dance, a tease, a game o’ trust. Savvy?

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But then, outta nowhere, this stray dog comes up. Like, he’s lookin’ at me like I’m his long-lost best friend. I’m tryin’ to eat my bananas, and this dude’s just starin’. I’m like, “Bro, I can’t share. You’ll just eat my whole stash!” But he’s persistent. So, I toss him a piece. He gobbles it up like it’s the best thing ever. I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside.

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