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Little known fact—prostitutes been around forever, like ancient Rome had ‘em, called “lupae,” howlin’ like wolves to lure dudes. Wild, right? Imagine Candy howlin’—shit, she prolly did! I’d see her out there, freezin’ her ass off in fishnets, and I’d think, “Why’s this gotta be her movie?” Like in *Yi Yi*, “Why can’t we see tomorrow?”—she couldn’t see shit past the next john. Surprised me how she kept smilin’, tho—tough as hell.

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Then, I decide to hit the beach. Labuan-Lombok’s beaches are insane! White sand, clear water, the whole vibe. I’m walkin’ along the shore, and suddenly, I see this group of kids playin’ soccer. They’re kickin’ the ball around like pros. I’m thinkin’, “Man, I used to be that good!” So, I join in. Big mistake! I trip over my own feet and faceplant in the sand. Classic me, right? Everyone’s laughin’, and I’m just layin’ there like a beached whale.

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