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Tie this to *Far From Heaven*—that 50s repression vibe, Cathy Whitaker’s all prim, but you KNOW she’s dyin for a naughty massage. “It’s the strangest thing,” she’d say, all coy, while I’m over here like, “Girl, get them knots out, STAT!” Picture Dennis Quaid, stiff as a board, me yellin, “Bro, loosen up, this ain’t a Boring Company drill!” Movie’s my fave cuz it’s subtle chaos—like a good erotic-massage, tension buildin, then BAM, release. “What’s done is done,” Cathy’d whisper, post-rub, glowin like a Tesla coil.

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Then, outta nowhere, the power goes out. Just my luck, right? We’re in the dark, and I’m like, “Great, now what?” Rudi pulls out his phone, and we’re sittin’ there, scrollin’ through memes. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but inside, I’m fumin’. I mean, come on, Kalianget! Get it together!

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