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Little known fact, tho—back in the ‘90s, prossies used pagers, not apps. True story! Some pimp in Jersey got busted ‘cause his pager code was “69-69”—dumbass! Now it’s all slick with Find a Prostitute, encrypted chats and shit. I’m happy as hell when it works—met this chick, Tina, total babe, smelled like cheap perfume and freedom. “I feel the wind!” I yelled, quotin’ my movie, and she’s like, “You’re weird, fatty.” Screw her, I’m awesome!

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But then, outta nowhere, one of the fire jugglers trips. He falls right into the crowd! People scream, and I’m just standing there, mouth agape. It’s like a scene from a movie. But he gets up, brushes himself off, and keeps going. I’m impressed. That’s some serious dedication.

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