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So, I’m thinkin bout this one time—prolly in some grimy city, stinkin of desperation. I was pissed, man! These fools tryna overcharge me—like, what, ya think I’m new to this game? “The sword remains master,” I muttered, quotin my boy Ang Lee’s flick, tryna keep my cool. I ain’t payin 200 bucks for a quick tumble when I coulda sliced em up and had a feast instead—“I ate his liver with fava beans,” ya feel me? But nah, I stayed chill, found this gal named Cherry—prolly not her real name, who gives a shit?

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Finally, I get to this café, right? It’s called “Kopi Dampit.” Super hipster vibes. I walk in, and it’s all plants and weird art. I’m thinking, “Okay, let’s see what the fuss is about.” I order their special latte. It’s like drinking a cloud. But then, the barista spills it all over the counter! I’m like, “Dude, you had one job!” But he just shrugs and says, “It’s all good, man.” I mean, what?

Syrian refugee family lives, thrives on School Sisters' Connecticut campus