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Alright, listen up folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—talkin’ to ya like you’re my buddy ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Yeah, I said it! Look, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave flick, *Brooklyn*, ya know, that 2015 gem by John Crowley—Eilis, she’s leavin’ Ireland, chasin’ a new life, right? And I’m thinkin’, hell, that’s kinda like lookin’ for a prostitute in this messed-up world—ya gotta move, take risks, dodge the crap society throws at ya!

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Then, I bump into my buddy, Rudi. He’s always got the latest gossip. “Did you hear about the new café on Jalan Diponegoro?” he says. I’m like, “Nah, spill the tea!” Apparently, it’s got the best es kopi in town. So, of course, we gotta check it out.

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