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Alright, listen up, brah! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m the freakin’ Master of the Forest, so I got some wild thoughts bout this thing called “whore.” Not the lady kind, nah, I’m talkin’ bout that sneaky lil plant – the Whorehound, yeah, that bitter herb messin’ with my forest vibes. Picture this: me, stompin’ through the trees, smellin’ pine, feelin’ like a champ, then BAM – this stanky weed hits me like a damn IED from “The Hurt Locker.” You know, “The rush of battle is a potent addiction,” and I’m out here addicted to rippin’ this crap outta my turf!

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in Malinau, right? The sun’s blazin’ through my window on Jl. Raya Malinau. I’m like, “Great, another day in paradise.” But nah, it was anything but that.

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