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Oi, mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, y’know, the witty imp— “I drink and I know things.” So, lemme spill some wine-soaked thoughts bout findin a prostitute, yeah? Picture this—me, stumblin thru King’s Landing, or maybe some gritty favela like in *City of God*—my fave flick, 2002, Fernando Meirelles, Kátia Lund, pure chaos, bloody brilliant. “Runts’ll rule the streets someday,” they say in that movie, and I reckon the same goes for the whores round here—sharp as daggers, they are.

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Man, what a day! I swear, being a lifeguard in Balapulang is like riding a rollercoaster with no seatbelt. So, I roll up to the beach, right? It’s a sunny day, perfect for chillin’ at Pantai Balapulang. The waves are lookin’ sweet, and I’m feelin’ good. But then, bam! Chaos hits.