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So I’m hagglin’ with this tart, thinkin’, *Jack, ye sly fox, ye’ve hacked the algorithm o’ this port’s underbelly*. “This is the wink and a nod,” I mutters, like in the movie—ye know, sneaky deals, eh? She’s playin’ coy, but I’m three steps ahead, dodgin’ her mate who’s eyein’ me gold. “Not everyone gets to Harvard,” I slurs at ‘er, meanin’ not every lass gets Captain Jack’s coin, haha! She laughs—prolly thinks I’m daft, but I’m just drunk ‘n’ clever.
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Finally, I get a hold of the power company. They’re like, “Yeah, we’ll send someone.” I’m thinking, “Great, but when?” Meanwhile, I’m stuck listening to hold music that sounds like a cat walking on a piano.
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