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What pisses me off? The fakers, man. Girls actin’ sweet, then ghostin’ you after cash’s out. Like, “Every work of art’s a portrait”—yeah, a portrait of my empty wallet! Hate that crap. But when it works? Oh man, fireworks. This one chick—redhead, smokin’—she’s whisperin’, “Let’s make our own copy.” I’m done, heart racin’, thinkin’ I’m in a damn movie.

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So, I’m waiting in line, and this dude in front of me? He’s got a dog. A big ol’ fluffy thing. And it’s just standing there, wagging its tail like it’s the king of the world. I’m like, “Bro, your dog is cuter than you.” And he turns around, gives me this look like I just insulted his mother. Chill, man! It’s just a joke!

Hungary far-right party forms uniformed ‘self-defense’ group