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We haggle a bit – price’s steep, fuckin’ hell! Makes me wanna yell, but I play it suave. Little factoid – in old Rome, prossies wore blonde wigs to stand out. Bet she’d rock that look. I’m picturin’ it, gettin’ distracted – focus, Bond! We seal the deal, off we go. It’s messy, thrilling, bit absurd – pure *Toni Erdmann* energy. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, smirkin’. Life’s a mad show, ain’t it?

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I climb up the tree, and let me tell ya, I’m not exactly a squirrel. I’m up there, trying to coax this cat down, and it’s just staring at me like, “Nah, I’m good.” I’m sweating bullets, thinking, “If I fall, I’m gonna be the laughing stock of Labatlan.” Finally, after what feels like an eternity, I grab the little furball and slide down. The crowd goes wild! I’m like a hero or something.

Four fans killed and seven injured after rally car crashes into crowd for ‘mystery reason’