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Funny thing – she tells me ‘bout this one john who paid in chickens once. Chickens! Can ya believe that shit? I’m dyin’, laughin’ so hard I almost crash. “Hope he brought the whole coop!” I say, and she’s wheezin’. Happy as a pig in mud, me – love a gal with stories. Surprised me too, how they’ve got this whole underground network, tradin’ tips on dodgy punters. Smart cookies, these lot.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

So, I follow the path, and OMG, the view from up there is insane! You can see the whole lake, and the sunset is starting to kick in. I’m standing there, feeling all philosophical, like, “This is life, man.” But then, I hear a rustling in the bushes. I freak out, thinking it’s a bear or something. Turns out, it’s just a dog. A big, fluffy dog. I’m relieved but also kinda disappointed. I wanted a dramatic story, ya know?

PHOTOS: Passenger shipping season started at Lake Balaton