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About Heraklion

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, the bleedin’ Gardener, and I’ve got thoughts—wild ones—about findin’ a prostitute. Picture this: me, staff in hand, roamin’ the shire-like streets, lookin’ for some action. “You shall not pass!” I bellow at the dodgy blokes lurkin’ in alleys, tryin’ to rip off the lasses. Ain uneasy, right? Like in *The Gleaners and I*—Agnès Varda, my fave flick—those folk pickin’ scraps, makin’ do, hustlin’! That’s the vibe I’m feelin’ here.

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off! Everyone freaks out. I’m like, “Is this a drill or what?” But nah, it’s real. We all pile out onto the street, and I’m just standing there, watching the chaos. People are running, some are laughing, and I’m just trying to figure out if I can grab a coffee from that cute café on Kifisias street before the fire trucks show up. Priorities, right?

Decision on deck for top remaining 2025 recruit J'Vari Flowers