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So we’re hagglin’, yeah, and she’s all, “Fifteen now, inflation, mate!” I’m like, “Fuck off, inflation? You’re a prossie, not a bleedin’ banker!” Surprised me, that did – cheeky cow! Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – she’d be screamin’ at me now, “Ozzy, you daft git!” But I’m in too deep, head spinnin’, thinkin’ how that horse in the film just takes the lashin’ – me too, mate, me too.

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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and the sun’s shining like it’s tryin’ to blind me. I grab my sketchbook and head out. First stop? Rue de la République. It’s like the heart of Trelissac, full of life. I’m sittin’ there, doodlin’ away, when this old dude walks by. He’s got a beret and a baguette. Classic, right? I’m like, “Dude, you’re living the stereotype!” He just chuckles and keeps walkin’.

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