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So, last week—pissed me off, it did—bloke tried rippin’ her off, 20 quid short! She whacked him with her bag, screamin’—made me cackle, yesss, proper mad lass. Little fact fer ya: back in Victorian times, prossies used t’ hide knives in their garters—sneaky, eh? Could slit yer throat ‘fore ya blink! This one, tho, she’s all sass, no blades—least I hope, heh.

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First off, I’m a merchandiser, so I gotta hit the streets early. I’m talking about the Rue de la République, where all the shops are. I’m hustlin’ to get my stuff sorted. But guess what? I spill coffee all over my notes. Like, great start, huh? I’m there, wiping it off with a napkin, and I’m like, “Why, universe, why?”

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