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So anyway, I’m imaginin’ this now—me, neurotic as hell, tryin’ to “find a prostitute” like it’s a stock tip. I’d overthink it—disease risks, legal crap, am I gettin’ scammed? I’d be yellin’ at my phone, “Gimme a sign, dammit!” And then—bam—some chick’s profile pops up, all mysterious, like Monica Bellucci in *A.I.*—and I’m like, “Whoa, too hot, abort mission!” I’d freak out, spill my coffee, total Larry David meltdown. “I can’t do this, I’m too old!”

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The town square near the Mairie... oh boy, it's my fav hangin’ spot. People sit, chat, and sometimes things get wild – kinda like those bomb squeeze scenes in the flick, where tension's so thick, ya can cut it with a butter knife. I even had a heated debate there once about kids these days – guess what? Love 'em, but I was mad as hell 'bout their constant glances at phones.

LCR Architectes clads French middle school with tarnished copper panels