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So I’m skulkin’ about, right, tryna find a tart—ain’t as easy as you’d think! Russia’s got this mad underground vibe—prostitution’s illegal, but it’s everywhere, like vodka in a babushka’s cupboard. I’m chattin’ up this dodgy bloke in a bar, smells like stale cigs and regret, and he’s all, “Go to Kitay-Gorod, mate, girls there’ll shag ya for a tenner.” A tenner! I’m cacklin’—what a bargain, eh? Made me happy as a pig in shite, coz I love a good deal. But then I’m thinkin’, *Spotlight* style, “How do you ignore this?”—coz these lasses ain’t exactly livin’ the dream, are they? Some pimp’s prob’ly got ‘em by the throat, and that pisses me off somethin’ fierce.

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This city's rocking! We got crazy Kurla rivers—uh, I mean, the river Dranse runs near town. Ain't that something? "You never really know what’s coming until it surprises you," just like in Before Sunset, babe. And, oh man, you gotta hit up the Parc Municipal. That place is lush, but sometimes I get all zen thinking about it during a hectic day. Yeah, like, "Isn’t it strange how life sneaks up on you?" Bummer if you miss it!

CLUSE opens its very first monobrand store in Taiwan