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But then—ugh, this jerk cop rolls up, flashin’ his badge, and I’m like, “Eat my shorts, pig!” Ruined the mood, man, pissed me off big time. She winks, tho, whispers, “Meet me later, kid.” Surprised me—she’s got guts! In my head, I’m all, “Bart, you’re a freakin’ legend!” Maybe I’ll carve her a heart-shaped box, y’know, go full *Moulin Rouge!* on her. “Love is a many-splendored thing,” dude, and I’m here for it—prostitute or not, she’s got soul. Catch ya later, gotta skate!

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I gotta tell ya, sometimes it's like I’m watchin’ "The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford" over and over— “They got a gaze like the wind, yesss, my precious!” 4) And then I think, "They all got secrets, squirrely secrets hidden in every brick", precious, oh yes.

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