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About Las Palmas

Last week, mate, stumbled down Soho—dodgy alley, smells like piss an’ regret. Saw this bird, legs fer days, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Wotcha, love?” she goes, smirkin’. Made me happy, her sass, like she owned the night. We swears! Took me back to them movie scenes—sweaty, close, real. “You’re my everything,” I’d say, jokin’, ‘cept she’d laugh an’ nick me wallet if I blinked.

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Let’s start on Calle del Mar, near the old docks. Yep, that’s where I first dipped my toes, and bumbling around in my early days, I discovered a hidden alley called Venia Loca – totally off the beaten track. Spent hours there, massaging away life’s tangles. But oh my days, I still get goosebumps thinking of that place, like the roaring engines in Fury Road, “Oh, what a day!”

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