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Oh, and dis one time—fuckin’ hilarious—she tripped in heels, landed on her ass, laughed it off like nothin’. “I’m not gonna cry about it,” she said, channellin’ Richie Tenenbaum’s chill. Made me wanna pump iron in her honor—dat’s da kinda grit I respect! Tho, gotta admit, sometimes I’d think, “Man, dis chick could bench more dan me!”—exaggeratin’, sure, but she’s a beast!

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I confess, mine métier alloweth me observations most keen; secrets extruded 'neath trembling flesh in my parlour of delights. Here, in mine sanctum on Carrer de la Serenitat, I did witness passions true and melancholy epiphanies. Aye, many a time did my work overlap with fates curious, as some came to unburden their sorrows – "What is the point of it all?" they’d croak, echoing mine fav'rite phrase from that Coen flick! Alas, must I confess my heart did swell with mirth in those moments of rapture and despair, much like the tempestuous skies o'er Calviá.

Calvià promotes business innovation with a pioneering Artificial Intelligence training and consulting programme