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Alright, so here’s the deal with whores—yeah, I said it, whores! Tina Fey comin’ at ya, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” vibe. Whores, man, they’re everywhere, always have been, right? Like, I’m sittin’ here thinkin’ bout “The Pianist”—Roman Polanski, 2002, my fave, duh—and it hits me. Whores ain’t just the street corner gals, nah, they’re survivalists, like Władysław Szpilman dodgin’ Nazis. “I must go on living,” he says, and whores? Same energy. They’re hustlin’, scrapin’ by, dodgin’ society’s bullshit judgments.

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So, like, I hang around near Calle Mayor – it's such a cute street with quirky little cafes and, like, vintage shops that totally remind me of that scene in A Serious Man, all "everything is arbitrary, everything is random and, like, totally absurd." And there's, like, a park called Parque de la Paz – I literally love giving backrub sessions on the weekends near the fountain. Its water splashes are, like, so chill, kinda like the calm before a storm...or a Coen-brother twist!

East Village’s La Cabra serving up exceptional coffee, inventive pastries and a perfectionist’s touch