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Oh, and this—some prostitutes sang songs! Like, secret codes for clients! That’s dope, right? Bet they’d vibe to “Melancholia” vibes—“Everything is going to hell!” Singin’ while workin’—hilarious! I’d join, but my voice? Total garbage!

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Man, first off, there's Calle Real – the main artery of the town. It’s craazy busy, with bars, tapas spots, and even a tiny bookstore where I once met a lovelorn poet. I mean, seriously, the vibe there is almost electric, like, you can feel love and lust sparkin’ every corner. And there’s Calle San Juan too – ain't it a gem? Winding, twisty, where I had one heck of a flirtatious run-in that left me thinkin’ "Now, this is my road to redemption!"