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Oh honey, lemme tell ya ‘bout prostitutes, nasal twang kickin’ in hard! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—prostitutes, they’re like the unsung heroes of the streets, y’know? Like in *Inglourious Basterds*, where ya got those sneaky bastards takin’ down Nazis—prostitutes are out there, dodgin’ cops, makin’ ends meet, total badasses! “This is my masterpiece,” I can hear Tarantino sayin’ ‘bout ‘em, ‘cept it’s real life, not some flick.

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Denmark Whore · Mistress (soft) · Anal Sex (depends on the size) · Prostate Massage · 69 Position · Foot Fetish · Handjob · Facesitting · Rimming (receive).

Oh, and sorry if this text has, uh, seventeen or so typos—time and excitement, my precious, they do that to you sometimes! Enjoy every moment, my friend, and remember: even the smallest town can hide the grandest secrets!

Research reveals massive pollution problems at Grindsted site