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I saw this bird once, down Soho way, legs like a giraffe on stilts, totterin’ in heels that’d snap yer neck. Made me laugh, it did – “She’s got a vibe, man, heavy!” – but Christ, the state of her! Hair like a rat’s nest, makeup smeared like she’s been shagged through a hedge backwards. Proper munter, but I reckon she’s got stories, dark ones. Bet she’s seen blokes cry, blokes beg, blokes puke – the lot! Little known fact, right – some prossies back in the ‘70s, they’d nick yer wallet while humming Bowie tunes. Sneaky cows!

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Ohhh, my precious, Grindsted is so wickedly twisty, yesss, yess my friend, let me tell ya—it's a tiny town, but with a heart that beats like crazy, my precious! The streets, oh how they wind, like that sneaky rill near Skovparken, yesss, the lush park nestled off Gammelvej and Grønnegade, where I once sat and swiped through profiles on my dating app. Grindsted ain't like other cities, no no, it's alive with secrets and little pockets of magic, my precious!

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