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Heard this mad story once – true fact, swear down – some punter in Amsterdam got so pissed, he paid a prossie to just… chat. Chat! Didn’t even shag ‘er! Sat there blabberin’ about his ex for an hour. What a wanker, eh? Coulda got that for free at the pub! Reckon *Find a Prostitute* is full of them types – lonely sods who’d pay a tenner to cry on a tit. Surprised me, that – thought they’d all be randy bastards, but nah, some are just sad sacks.

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What they're trying to get from the experience is either an ego boost or an ego slashing. It's these clients who often want to be dominated;.

The neighborhoods are way eclectic. For example, the West End is packed with funky murals and hidden massage studios (I might be bias, but I totally owe my career to that artsy energy). Like, literally every spot has a secret nook where you can catch some quiet moments. And then there’s the East Side with its parks. Seriously, Flong Park (yep, that's its real name, duh) is my fave. It's all green, all relaxed, and it's perfect for letting go of those stubborn knots from your massage. Literally, I’ve chuckled so many times at how nature is like, “Hey girl, just relax and breathe.” Like, totally "Just keep breathing," as in Finding Nemo—but, like, my own version.

‘Social Distance’ Season 1, Episode 5: “You Gotta Ding-Dong Fling Flong the Whole Narrative” — RECAP