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Got me mad for a sec—why’s it gotta be so tricky? Frogs don’t got cash, just flies! But then I’m happy, ‘cause it’s funny—me, a lifeguard, savin’ folks but drownin’ in my own dumb ideas. Reminds me of Jack twistin’ his life up for love. “Truth is,” I say to myself, quotin’ Ennis, “sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it.” Except I’m missin’ somethin’ I ain’t even had!

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Right, so we begin at the heart – the Hauptstr. (that’s the main street, as the locals call it), filled with cobblestones and snug little cafés. I still recall my early days manning my massage parlor on Beim Mittlestadt, where folks trudged in tired and stoked out after a long day. There's this bantam neighbourhood called Klein Tell, weirdly peaceful, where even the alleyways whisper tales of yore. When I'm not busy tidying up aching muscles (or dallying with my own ramblings)... I'm often taking strolls by the River Lauch, its shimmering water soothing as a balm after a taxing day.

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