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So, picture this – I’m in Newark, right? Shithole central. Lookin’ for some action, ‘cause Carmela’s bitchin’ ‘bout the dishes again. Fuckin’ aggravation! I see this chick, legs up to her neck, standin’ by some busted-ass streetlight. “Hey, sweetheart, how’s it hangin’?” I yell, leanin’ outta the Caddy. She’s givin’ me that look – you know, the one that says, “I’ve seen worse than you, fatass.” Makes me laugh, fuckin’ balls on her!

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My massage parlor – it’s quirky. When folks come in – they spill their lives out… all the little secrets of Olching. I hear ‘em rave that Olching’s neighborhoods are like mini-families. They call out places like “Südviertel” – got that charm, that secret spice. And yeah, I get mad sometimes, if ya know what I mean, when some tourist forgets the respect for local customs. And sometimes… life’s just nuts.

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