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About Essen

Alright, mate, gather round! I’m Gandalf, wise as fuck, and I’m here to spill the tea on whores—yes, whores! Not some prissy elf nonsense, but the real deal. “You shall not pass!” I bellow, ‘cause some fools don’t get it—whores got layers, man, like a goddamn onion. Been watchin’ *Almost Famous* again—best flick ever, Cameron Crowe’s a genius—and it’s got me thinkin’. That line, “I am a golden god!”—whores could yell that shit too, struttin’ their stuff, ownin’ it.

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Strolling by the Lichtenberg Bridge makes me feel surreal. I sometimes halts mid-walk, thinkin’, “damn, didn’t expect beauty from concrete jungles.” And my massage parlor's right on the corner of Sonnenallee—overheard some wild street tales, man. Every client spins a new story. I get mad sometimes 'cause folks never appreciate the soul of a city, but I always laugh it off – life’s chaotic, bruv.

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