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But—get this—sometimes it’s funny, right? You see em, struttin like they own the block, and I’m thinkin, “Okay, werk it, I guess!” Kinda admire the hustle—WALL-E’d tip his lil box head, maybe. Still pisses me off tho—why’s it gotta be so LOUD? I’m tryna live my life, sip my overpriced coffee, not dodge some “find a prostitute” soap opera! And don’t get me started on the cops—useless! Saw one just standin there, eatin a donut—cliché much? I’m yellin in my head, “Do somethin, ya schmuck!” But nah, it’s all a mess, a big, fat, “Buy n Large” mess!

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Now, lemme tell ya 'bout my fav spot – a hidden park called Spiegelgarten. It’s well secret, and only locals know it, so don’t go shoutin’ it from the rooftops, aight? It’s got these lush greens, small ponds, and me time for some heavy meditation sessions. One time, I was on a deep relax therapy session, and I nearly started recitin’ "There Will Be Blood" lines – “I have a competition in me.” Brilliant, innit?

Bad blood stirred by scarf row ahead of DFB-Pokal final