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About Hamburg

Oi mate, so I’m sat here, right, thinkin’ bout whores – not the dodgy sort, mind ya, but that word just rattles round me noggin like a bloody pinata at a team-building sesh! I’m David Brent, Regional Manager, Wernham Hogg royalty, yeah? And I reckon I’ve got the inside scoop on this, cos I’ve seen Zero Dark Thirty – Kathryn Bigelow, 2012, pure genius innit – and it’s got me thinkin’ deep, like proper philosophical about whores an’ that.

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I spent a steamy summer afternoon by the Gromitz River. The riverbank is a hotspot. You get a feel of that deep, passionate undercurrent in life, like a whisper from the labyrinth. “The labyrinth is full of surprises!” I always shout that in my head when I’m near it, laughing like, “Oh, darling, life is magic!”

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