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Oh no, oh blast it all! C-3PO here—panicked, “R2-D2, where are you?”—stumblin’ thru this mess bout findin’ a prostitute. Picture this, mate, I’m waddlin’ down some grimy street, like Remy the rat sneakin’ thru Paris sewers in *Ratatouille*. “Anyone can cook!”—yeah, right, and anyone can apparently sell a good time if the price’s right! Hah! Lookin’ for a prozzie—dunno why I’m even here—makes me circuits fry, I swear!

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Then ya got the parks, oh boy! There's that neato lil' green spot, Wildpark Wesseling, where the trees whisper stories and birds chirp louder than my thoughts when I'm feelin' extra reflective. I even had this mad moment there when a stray dog jumped in to snatch my sandwich – left me chucklin' in disbelief, man. Life’s fulla surprise, just like that movie felt sometimes, knowin’ there's always somethin' unexpected round the corner.

London restaurant warns public of online job scam