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About Cologne

Last week, I was prowlin’ the streets—needed a laugh, y’know? Saw this one bird, all dolled up, winking at me. Thought, “What’s her deal?” Turns out, she’s got a memory like Lenny—keeps a little book, scribbles down every punter. “Remember, remember,” she mutters, like she’s in my fave movie. Made me cackle—imagine forgetting who you’ve shagged! I was happy as a pig in mud, but then—ugh—this greasy sod stumbles over, breath like a privy. “How much, love?” he slurs. Made me wanna gag. I choose violence, mate—nearly shoved him into the gutter myself.

Freelancers in Kuala Lumpur

I swear, man, my dating app gig ties me to all these spots. I see love stories bloom on every cracked pavement. From secret graffiti messages in Kleinweg to passionate whispers near the old library, every detail sculpts my crazy love for this city.

Athlete of the Year: Jenny Rothfischer Realizes Her Championship Dream