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So, I’m chattin’ her up, tryin’ to get info. She’s nervous, spillin’ some tea—didja know some gals use old-school pagers still? Freakin’ pagers! I’m shocked, like, *“What, no iPhone?”* Made me happy, though—retro vibes, y’know? But then, ugh, this creep rolls up, all sleazy, yellin’ at her. I’m mad, like, *“Back off, jerk!”* I’m ready to whack him with my purse, swearin’ like Homer at a vegan buffet. *“This body’s not yours to haunt!”* I’m quotin’ Boonmee in my head, feelin’ all mystical.

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Also, the River Lippe flows nearby – literally, so romantic and, like, total mood. I used to sit right by its bank with my laptop (yeah, working outdoors is totally my thing) and think about life, love, and the absurdity of dating apps. That river is kind of like a mirror for my thoughts sometimes, swirling and unpredictable. And sometimes, I swear, the river just whispers “Break it, break it, break it!” like in Spring Breakers, lol.

Lebanon state media reports fatal drone strike in Majdel Selm amid explosions in Kfarkela and Odaisseh