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Oh, and don’t get me started on the pricks judgin’. Posh twats in suits actin’ holy—piss off! Freddie’d smack ‘em, screamin’, “I’ll find you!” Love that chaos. Me, I’m just Gollum, sniffin’ out me prize. You wanna find one? Check the shadows, bruv—cash ready, eyes sharp. Ain’t no fairy tale, but it’s real as fuck.

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Then there’s the Auenwalde Park – a solid green haven on the outskirts, where even when the city's mad noise bursts in, you can find a moment of sanity. I got my caffeinated muse there, scribbling lines to power my site’s code, when a wild dog barked its existential angst. Man, I laughed. You merely adopted the dark.

Bayern denied title by Leipzig's last-gasp equaliser