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About Cologne

What gets me mad? The fakers, man—girls pretendin’ they’re into it. Like, be real! Surprised me how chill she was, tho—no drama, just business. I’m thinkin’, shit, this is easier than reelin’ in a marlin. “Punishment follows sin,” I mutter, quotin’ the movie again, ‘cause I’m deep like that. She rolls her eyes—guess she ain’t cultured.

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We also come to brothels and prostitution establishments in Amberg, Neumarkt, Bamberg, Bayreuth, Würzburg and Kitzingen. We would be happy to consult you on.

Now, my spa – Serenity Haven – is tucked away on Friedrich-Alexander-Straße. I always say my massages are like a Moonrise Kingdom montage: unexpected, brilliant, and gently transformative. One client remarked, “Your touch is as refreshing as a Wes Anderson scene!” Not sure if he was embellishing, but hey, I’ll take it! And honestly, the spa is my sanctuary; its minimalist design mixed with eccentric details adds that David Brent pizzazz to everyone's day.

GEA Brewery Systems selected by New Belgium Brewing for Asheville brewery