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I dig it, makes me happy – them tense muscles just meltin’ away. But lemme tell ya, some parlors? Shady as heck! Got me steamed once – paid big bucks, and it’s just a lousy rubdown, no spark. False advertisin’, doc! Shoulda known – if it’s cheap, it’s crap. Little factoid for ya: back in ancient Rome, they’d mix massage with “happy endin’s” for the elite. Wild, huh?

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Dude, this town got its quirks. There's a tiny park, Sonnenschein Park (yeah, sounds cheesy, I kno), where I used to chill during my lunch breaks. Look, the river, the Flussbach, winds around like it’s got a mind of its own – kinda meditative when you're giving a massage, and sometimes I talk to it, all dramatic. I tis absolute magic! I remember one rainny day, while I was setting up a massage table, I saw the reflections of street lights on the wet cobbles of Kaiserstraße... felt like a scene from Far From Heaven, all moody and epic.

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