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Funny thing – she calls me “big guy,” smirks, “You lost or somethin?” Sarcasm drippin, brother! I’m like, “Nah, just cruisin for a champ!” We haggle – she’s sharp, ups the price, I flex back, “Hulkster don’t overpay!” Landed a deal, tho – fair, no BS. Little tip: always carry small bills, brother – they hate big ones, slows shit down.

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Don’t even get me started on the riverside walk! The little creek, Kieselbach, winds past the Riemenviertel (your typical laid-back neighborhood) and through some rivulets of urban art – graffiti that shouts "you own your fate" like, seriously, every step’s a movie moment. Crazy stuff, right? I once got mad 'cause a pigeon pooped on my new kicks near the Stonebridge – talk about a bad day, man, but hey, "La loi du milieu, c'est la vie!"

This 91-Year-Old Gymnast Is Seriously More Graceful Than You'll Ever Be