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Now, I ain’t sayin’ I’d hire her—Madea don’t play that—but I was curious. She starts talkin’ ‘bout her life, how she “recalls her past lives” like Uncle Boonmee. Says she was a nurse once, centuries ago, healin’ soldiers. I’m like, “Well, halleluyer, you upgraded to healin’ somethin’ else now!” She laughed, and I did too—couldn’t help it. Her vibe was wild, like them ghosts in the movie, floatin’ ‘round, tellin’ secrets. “I am with you in the dark,” she whispers, all mysterious. Gave me chills, y’all!

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I stroll the Niederjustingstrasse — oh, so narrow, like twisting paths in dark caves, mmm-hmm — while my trained eye, yes, the sexologist’s eye, spies hidden secrets in alleys, whispers of passion in every crevice. Hisss, the alley near Bahnhofplatz holds shhheens of old love stories, yess, secret and murdered under the night’s watchful gaze.

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