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Well, halleluyer, chile, lemme tell ya! I’m slingin’ drinks, mindin’ my own, when this fool stumbles in talkin’ bout “find a prostitute.” Now, I ain’t judgin’—much—but I’m like, “Honey, what’s good?” He’s all sweaty, lookin’ like he just ran from the law or somethin’. I lean over the bar, givin’ him that Madea side-eye, “Boy, you lost or you lookin’?” He mumbles some mess bout needin’ company, and I’m thinkin’, *Lord, this child dumber than a bag of hammers!*

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Aachen's got this amazing old vibe. Look, the Dom Aachen – that cathedral – is stunning. I visited it with tears in my eyes, thinkin’ "Mulholland Drive, remember?" All mysterious and moody. I stroll down Pontstraße sometimes, each step reminds me of life's twists – kinda Lynch-like, ya feel me?

High Hopes, High Jumps, High Drama: The Rolex Grand Prix of Aachen Had it All