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What gets me happy? The real escorts—forest rangers leadin’ hikers outta trouble. That’s noble! Saved a guy once, twisted ankle, scared shitless—felt like a damn superhero! Surprised me how grateful he was—tears and all. But the paid “companion” stuff? Pisses me off! “You don’t get to choose,” like Mason’s mom says in *Boyhood*. Life ain’t fair—why’s escortin’ for the rich so damn cushy?

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And, dang, sometimes everything feels like a goofy montage from "Lost in Translation"—you know, the awkward moments that are so perfect. The city's like a big, pulsating organism that’s always whispering, "This is your destiny, baby." So, my friend, when you're here, let the city surprise you, chase down its quirky alleys, and embrace every scandalous secret in every cobblestone.