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Oi, precious, listen up! Me, a barista? Nah, I’m Gollum, sneaky-like, slingin’ coffee, watchin’ folk. Findin’ a prostitute, eh? We hates it! Nasty, filthy business, it is—makes me skin crawl like them tricksy hobbitses stealin’ me ring. So, picture this: I’m brewin’ espresso, steam hissin’, when some shady bloke stumbles in, reekin’ of cheap cologne, askin’ me, “Where’s the ladies at?” I’m like, “We serves lattes, not lassies, ya twit!” He don’t get it—dumb as a sack o’ rocks.
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I be livin' here years, through storms. Crazy rain sometimes. Streets flood, even as neon shines. People mad, then happy, then mad again – just like a cocktail stirred by fate. So, when you visit, check out the funky vibes in the small markets on Jízdní. Offers odd snacks but tastes bomb.
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