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Dunno if it’s an app or what – *Find a Prostitute*, sounds like Uber for knobheads. Bet it’s got reviews too – “Sharon, 5 stars, great gob!” – fuckin’ hell, what a world. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but I’d not be shocked. Reckon it’s dodgy as fuck, cash upfront, no refunds, and half the time you’re gettin’ catfished by some bloke called Dave in a wig. “This is my city!” – nah, mate, it’s a scam!

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Now, I gotta drop a lil secret: there's a hidden riverside spot called Maji Bend. It's near the old chapel at Riverbend Street. I sit there sometimes, thinkin' bout life and my work helpin' women find their spark. It's magical, I tell yew! Sometimes, I even laugh at how these stories kinda mix with my soul.

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