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Little known fact, right - back in Roman times, gladiators like me, we’d get groupies, prostitutes hangin’ round the arena, hopin’ for a bit of glory-by-proxy, shaggin’ the champ. Wild, eh? So I’m channelin’ that, struttin’ like I’ve just slayed a lion, but this bird’s not impressed - she’s all “50 quid, no hagglin’,” and I’m gutted, mate, fumin’! Where’s the banter, the negotiation? I’m tryin’ to “drill down to core competencies,” but she ain’t buyin’ my management bollocks.

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See, Babanki got these quaint alleys like Nyota Lane and tiny markets. Folks sell fresh veggies and local crafts. I'm all in love with the energy, even when I get mad at the mess sometimes. Yew never know who'll surprise you. "I don't want to survive. I want to live." (Yeah, that line from 12 Years a Slave hit me deep!)

Cameroon Situation Report, 2 February 2021