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About Bern

Oi, mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as hell, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m the bloody prison warden now, and you wanna hear bout prostitutes? Alright, let’s dive in, yeah? Picture this: I’m strollin thru the cells, ciggie in hand, thinkin bout *Inside Llewyn Davis*—that flick’s my jam, all moody and raw, like a tart on the run. “Man’s gotta eat,” Llewyn says, and ain’t that the truth for these girls? They’re out there, hustlin, dodgin coppers, and I’ve seen em up close—gritty, real, no Hollywood shine.

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Ah, then there's the river – though not a huge flashy one, this little stream skirts by the town and hums along, like background music to the city’s pulse. I hang out near it on moody nights, thinkin' how dreams do spiral. Sometimes, I get mad 'cause traffic on Hauptstrasse drives me nuts – slow and steady ain't always the case, ya know?

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