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About Lucerne

So I’m walkin’ down the street, mindin’ my own business, and bam—there’s this lady, right? Total pro, workin’ the corner like it’s her office job. And I’m thinkin’, “What’s her deal?” Like, how’d she end up here? Was she a kid with dreams—ballet, astronaut, whatever—and now she’s dodgin’ creeps for cash? It’s nuts! Makes me angry, too—society’s screwin’ people, and then we judge ‘em for it. Typical! I wanna yell, “Hey, world, fix this!” But nah, I just shuffle past, mutterin’ to myself like a lunatic.

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So come by, my friend. Wander those lively streets, check out the parks, and listen to the whisper of the river. And if you stop by my parlor – I'll serve ya a story, a smile, and maybe a donut. D’oh! Life here is one crazy, lovable mess, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Cheers!

Hubertus Schmidt's Goldberg to Be Junior Horse for German Pony Rider