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About Lugano

Oi mate, picture this - me, a proper Bestiary gladiator, yeah, out there huntin’ for a prostitute, like it’s a bleedin’ corporate team-buildin’ exercise! Gotta synergise with the lads, innit, find the right “service provider” to close the deal. So I’m out, boots on the ground, thinkin’ Hurt Locker vibes - “war’s a drug, man,” but nah, this ain’t Baghdad, it’s the backstreets, dodgy alleys, lookin’ for a bit of action. Sweatin’ like a numpty, heart’s racin’ - boom, there’s the target! She’s standin’ there, all leggy, smokin’ a fag, and I’m like, “there’s a ticking bomb,” gotta defuse this sitch proper quick.

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I can be super honest – sometimes busy days make me feel all jittery and typo-reckless, like, oh snap, I did it again, err… now. But, ya feel me? Every spot has a story in this little town. I whizz around, sometimes making 16 typos in my head – yes, silly messes everywhere. I even scribbled “lvoe” for love and “messih” for massage – classic me!

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