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Once saw this lass, right, fishnets ripped, smokin’ a cig like she owned the night. Made me laugh—ha! “We needs it, precious!” I thinks. But nah, it’s grim—dudes leerin’, all sweaty, made me mad as hell. Why’s it gotta be so skeevy? Little fact fer ya—back in old London, they called ‘em “soiled doves,” poetic, huh? Sounds nicer than it is! We hates it—filthy coins changin’ hands, like some stinkin’ goblin trade.

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Yo yo, listen up my friend, lemme tell yooo about Ascona (ch)! OMG this place is so lit, ya know? I'm a masseur here for years, and let me say, every street got its own vibe! Check it: I'm always groovin' along to Via Giuseppe Garibaldi, where old souls and fresh café scenes mix. Seriously, this street's like, full of hidden gems – like my fave little spot, "La Bottega del Relax" (so chill, slay!).

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